I love Byward Market.

I was telling my buddies we can definitely have kick ass party here. The bars are all so close together. Bar hopping anyone? Please sign me up! Want to know the shitty thing about Byward market though? The shitty food. Blame it on the tourist trap mentality, but there is no good food here. Case in point: Our dinner at Play.




We didn’t really do any research nor made any reservations so we didn’t know where to go for dinner.

Life Boss has been angry at me lately and has refused to make any plans.


As such we were walking around Byward Market blind in hopes of finding a restaurant that we both can agree on. I personally wanted to sit down in a nice restaurant, with a good steak and a bottle of wine. I don’t know why. Was just one of those nights where I want to eat some good food, good conversations with good atmosphere. Play seemed to fit the bill. Hig reviews, restaurant looked nice, and they served steak. Fuck it, sign us up!

Oh how disappointed we were.

Firstly, this fucking place was a tapas restaurant. I fucking hate tapas restaurants. Small ass portions that is pricey. Not to mention most of the tapas places I’ve been too was complete shit. And this dining experience was no exception.

The dinner started well with this parma ham dish. You can tell the ham was fresh. Eating with the bread and mustard was just heaven in my mouth. After devouring this dish we were hungry for the next one. We were also very excited because we thought we made a great choice choosing this restaurant. How wrong we were.


The second dish was the duck wings. I love wings, but never had duck wings before so what the fuck let’s give it a try. It looked like it was drowned in sauce. No, it didn’t look it. It was drowning in this sweet sauce. We couldn’t taste the duck. We literally just had sauce. That being said, the sauce was still quite nice so we weren’t ready to give up on this restaurant yet….


Until our final two dishes came.

The first one was the seafood linguine. I saw everyone else order this linguine dish so I thought it must be really good. No I was wrong. This was a shit dish. There was no flavor to it. Yes you have your 4 mussels and 3 shrimps. But there was no flavor. The linguine it self was bland. The sauce was watery. I don’t know what the fuck I was eating but it definitely was not food.

The second was the steak. It shouldn’t really be called steak. It should be called “Here, have 6 slices of shitty, tough Canadian beef”. What the fuck. There was also no flavor to the beef. How do you fuck steak up. You just need to buy a good cut. And this shit set us back 20 bucks too. 6 pieces of shitty, tough Canadian beef for 20 bucks. Get the fuck out of here. You might as well just rob me.

Shitty Seafood Linguine
Shitty six piece steak
Our shitty meal


What a shit meal. Play restaurant, you really played us. You had such a good start with that parma ham. Then your chef decided to take the rest of the night off because I honestly don’t know what I was eating. All I kept thinking was “What is this shit, what am I eating”. Fuck you and your shitty food. I really hate tapas style dining.


Written from Toronto, Home on May 20, 2019

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