Random

To women in their 30s and Single – Perspective from a guy

It’s valentines day.  Or was valentines day.  So it’s only appropriate for me to publish this post now.

This post is to all the ladies, that are turning 30, are in their 30s, are passed 30s.  And single.  I am reaching an age where I am hitting this milestone, of the BIG 3-0.  Which also means I will have friends (some female) that will be hitting this milestone with me.

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Or are already in their 30s.

Or have passed their 30s.

I have repeated myself.  But you get the point.

Lately, I have been getting the sense that these lovely female friends are in a rush to find a husband. Phrases like:

“I need to find a husband”

“I need to find love”

“I can not be lonely”

“My eggs are dying”

have been repeated, more often than not (Maybe not the last one =p).

And all I am thinking in my head is, “uh………why”.

Granted, I am a guy (I hope you know that) so this is by no means an attempt to persuade the female population on changing their perception about this matter.  Rather, I just wanted to give my perspective on this little, issue.  I’d like to call this:

The Munky’s way of thinking, er…. for women….from a guy..

1 – You are the fountain of your happiness.  Not that guy. 

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Applies to a guy as well.  But gals, be confident! Natural happiness should come from within, not from another individual.  The equation of happiness should not be like this:

His Existence + His Needs = Your Happiness.

Rather it should be:

Your Happiness = Your Happiness.

Makes sense to me.  Instead of worrying about “that guy”, go out and enjoy the moment.  Which leads me to my next point:

2 – “Yesterday has gone, tomorrow has not come.  You only have today”

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Quoting John Maxwell.  My personal motto as well.  Dudette stop worrying about the unknown, which is the future.  If you can tell the future, then you probably should be buying the lottery instead.  Think of all the things you can buy. Like.

Hand bags. Make up. Clothes.  Shoes.

You know.  Things women like.

We can’t predict the future, don’t think we ever can.  You only have today.  Live it up, and enjoy it.  Which brings me to my next point (wow my thoughts are so coherent and organized this morning)

3 – “What you do today, will affect how you are tomorrow”

Another John Maxwell quote.

If I constantly tell people “I am ugly”, “I am lonely”, “I like to eat steak and not talk to people”, well you know what that comes off as very negative to those around you.

People then perceive you as, “ugly”, “lonely”, “eat steak and not talk to people”.

Be positive.  Come off positive.  And when that happens, good things are bound to happen.

4 – The egg problem

“My eggs are dying” – Female

Ok.  Adopt.  Sperm Bank.  Freeze your eggs.

Moving on.

5 – I will die alone

I will too.  Because, I don’t think it’s technically possible to die together at the same time.  Unless something tragic happens *knock on wood.

Oh you mean, you don’t want to live alone till you are on your death bed.  Fair.  See rule # 1.

Listen, love comes in many forms.  Family, Friends, Pets, Hobbies.  It doesn’t just have to come from a man.

Of course it’s great if you everything.  But life isn’t fair, you just deal with it.

6 – Keep life simple

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I think, keeping life is most important.

Life naturally is simple.  Keep it simple.  Don’t over complicate things.  Just because you haven’t found him, doesn’t mean you won’t. These are things you can not control.  So stop dwelling over it.

Keep.  Life.  Simple.

And exercise.  Exercise is very important.  There are also health benefits.  Read about it.

And…have the occasional drink =p

Overall Message

What I am trying to say after 600+ words is, girls stop fretting!

Listen, there’s two ways we can do this:

1) Live single, and miserable and die.

2) live single, enjoy life, travel, eat, have fun, laugh, cry, dance, drink, and then die.

Just a thought, from a guy.

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8 comments

  1. great post Munky! I am nowhere near 30 but seeing more and more people I know getting engaged, married etc kind of puts the pressure on things sometimes- especially when you have overbearing Asian parents/relatives! Thank you for putting things into perspective ;D

  2. Hellokitty tells the truth absolutely. Everyone journey is not the same so keep finding which one works for you and you most love to live or just whatever feels right for you without regret. Great blog and post Munky!!

  3. I agree with your overall msg. The fear of girls being > 30 and single mainly comes from pressures from family & friends, just because majority of the ppl are married and have kids, doesn’t mean 100% of the population have to. But because the society expects that majority means the “right way of life”, they judge those who are single and believe there is something wrong with them. But in fact, they don’t understand that being single can mean happiness too – travel, eating and having fun .. don’t need to be married to do that. It’s better being single then being in a marriage to someone that you will eventually get annoyed with just because you “need” to get marry.

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